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How to Ask Someone Out: Getting the Timing Right

Dating is a fun adventure which can lead to long term relationships, friendships and ultimately love. Knowing how to ask someone out and getting the timing right is an important process in developing relationships.

Before you can proceed, first you need a date! There are opportune times to ask someone out if you are paying attention.

Alternatively there are also moments when one should hesitate or refrain lest you stick your foot in your mouth and ruin your chances.

Below are some of the inappropriate and ideal times to get a date.

Inappropriate Timing

• Around Friends

Asking someone out in front of your friends or theirs may lead to an uncomfortable situation. The tension is already high as one waits in apprehension for a yes or no answer so why subject yourself to the scrutiny of judgment from everyone else around you. Wait until you have time alone to avoid feeling this embarrassment and nervousness.

• Interrupting Conversation

Blurting out, “Will you go out with me” in the midst of a conversation will not only shock people but will ultimately leave you feeling like a court jester. You will risk the perception that you are rude, awkward or without social skills if you interrupt. Be considerate and wait for the right time when all eyes are not on you and there is a lull in the conversation.

• At a Reverent Event

Funerals, churches or hospitals are not conducive venues for finding dates. If you find yourself in one of these circumstances, find patience. Figure out another way to get a hold of the person when it is more appropriate and there is a natural environment for asking someone out.

• When You are Intoxicated

While it may seem necessary to work up a little liquid courage, make sure you are not at the point where you are stumbling around. Slurred speech and vomiting right before you attempt to ask someone out are not the best way to insure you receive a yes answer.

Having self control says a lot about you. Besides, your prospect will be wary of your intentions and be unsure if you truly want a date or are simply too drunk to know what you are saying.

• Before You Have Said Two Words

In other words, if you haven’t even talked to the person, you definitely need a lesson in how to ask someone out and getting the timing right. Be sure you get to know them a little first. Otherwise your intentions are merely superficial as you have proven you are only interested in outward appearances.

Ideal Timing

Now, let’s take a look at the best case scenarios for how to ask someone out and getting the timing right.

• When there is mutual enjoyment in the conversation

They lean forward, nod eagerly, respond and ask questions, they are ultimately showing overall interest in you. Now is a good time to say casually, “Hey, I really enjoyed talking to you, would you like to hang out again sometime?”

• They keep looking

If you have had some interaction and you notice they are still looking your way, you should have a green light to ask.

• They talk about being single

More than likely these subtle conversational clues are a hint to do something about it. If they are letting you know they are on the market, they are giving you permission to ask them out.

• They motion for you to come over

If they are requesting your presence through smiling, winking, nodding or calling you over, more than likely you have an opportunity to ask them out. Don’t just blurt it out of course but rather wait for a moment when you can naturally invite them on a date during the conversation.

These are the comprehensive best and worse case scenarios when learning how to ask someone out and getting the timing right. Nothing, however, is cut and dry and you will need to use a bit of social savvy and intuition to gauge the person you are interested in dating. Keep in mind the importance of being real and considerate and you should have a terrific method for getting dates.

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