How to Keep a Conversation Going With Women
So, you saw her across the way. You made the bold move of walking over and saying hello; now what? The last
thing you want to have is a doe eyed frozen look with nothing interesting to say.
This is your moment! Luckily, there are tips to help you perfect the art of how to keep a conversation going
Whatever you do, don’t follow up your hello with a cheesy pick up line you memorized from Maxim. Pick up lines
are for guys who don’t have anything intelligent to say. Here’s what you do:
Any psychologist will tell you the best communication technique is to ask questions. Directing your attention
away from yourself and onto her is your best strategy. You can stick to the usual, “Where are you from, what is
your name, etc.
Or you can think of something eloquently clever such as, “When was the last time you walked into a room and
became immediately drawn to someone? No, really, has this ever happened to you?” This may get her to blush a little
but at least it’s a real question which could potentially open up a dialogue between you.
Share Yourself/Self Deprecation
As you ask questions about her you may include your own brief bio as well. She will hopefully be as eager, at
this point, to learn more about you. Use her answers in ways you can relate. Sharing yourself is important in how
to keep a conversation going with women and to keep her
interested. The last thing you want is for her to feel drilled and on the spot so, open up.
Do monitor yourself and consider how you are coming across. John Gray, Ph.D. and author of Mars and Venus on a
Date shares great advice in his statement, “It is not enough to merely be authentic in sharing yourself; to succeed
in dating you need to consider how you will be interpreted as well.”
Self deprecation is another fantastic way to keep a conversation light and help her feel easy. Knowing how you
ran out of the house with two different socks will not only make her laugh but will also let her know you are
confident in who you are. Don’t over-do it of course, but let her know you are a real person and not some pick-up
Avoid Awkward Silences
You shouldn’t have to jabber away incessantly to avoid awkward silences but do be aware they can occur and
create an unstable situation in the conversation. Should you come to a point in your conversation where you don’t
know what to say, seek a small distraction. Ask her to dance or order her a drink.
Do anything but sit there and stare at her like a weirdo. She will immediately want to wiggle her way out of
your vicinity. Keep her laughing if possible but don’t be the class clown. Don’t ask her what she is thinking
either. This is something you do later in a relationship when you have an established trust.
If you can’t physically do something to trigger new dialogue, simply ask another question. Anything simple will
do. “So, do you have siblings?” or “What are your favorite things to do?” are good examples of silence breaking
Again, reveal some of yourself. “I don’t usually get this nervous around women” is a fantastic way to make her
feel special and she will immediately empathize and help you feel more comfortable with her.
It is important to understand how to keep a conversation going with women as it will ultimately predict whether
a future date will potentially occur. Most men think women will do all the talking and all they have to do is sit
back and pretend to listen. This is not the case.
Women want someone who can actively engage in an adult conversation and keep them interested as well. If you
master this technique you will never be left standing with nothing to say after hello!
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